Rachel's Shitty Car Analogy

I found this journal entry dated 3/3/08, and it felt so right today. I'm sorry if it doesn't make any sense to you, but if you've ever felt this way about yourself, I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

After reading this chapter, [from When Panic Attacks]I have a lot to think about. One thing that came to my mind was this analogy.

I drive a 1995 Saturn. It's nothing special, and it sure isn't much to look at. I recently had to take it to the mechanic to get lots of things either fixed or replaced. My grand total: $790. Considering it's only a $3000 car, this seemed like a lot to me.

I paid the mechanic and walked around the building to find my money's worth. Instead, all I found was my same old, beat-up, 1995 piece of shit car. It looked the exact same. After all the hard work and all the money, it was now just a piece of shit that runs well. It didn't turn into a Mercedes or a BMW. So was it worth all the work and money to fix a shitty car?